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The Accidental Poet

Silly Kids Poems by, well... by Me

POEMS, POEMS

I think we all probably remember summers like this... I know I do.

ON AND ON AND ON

I just had to do it. It was calling to me, but I do apologize. It's sort of like singing seven out of eight notes in a scale...

NO RHYME

This saga of a Silly Kids Poem is, yes, something I actually did when I was a kid. And I know what you're thinking, "How did this guy make it out of childhood alive?"

TALE OF WOE

Inspired by another one of those sing songy kid's sayings. I'll do more as I think of them... like TOO SOON RACOON.

NOT NOW

Like I've said many times, these Silly Kids Poems just drop into my head and spew out of my pen. So I have no idea where this one came from.

DON'T FORGET

I think dogs are thinking deep thoughts and can't be bothered by mere humans. Perhaps about time travel.

STARING

As this Silly Kids Poem could mostly describe me, and maybe you, I've sometimes wondered if I'm part cat.

FIRST THOUGHTS

We call these bugs no-see-ems. And they drive me CRAZY. Almost invisible and always in my eyes and ears. Or is it just me?

BUZZING BUGS

As a kid I could not imagine anything better than PB and J. Mmmmmm! Although not so much any more, I still have taste memories that make me smile.

SPICES

I caught an Opossum eating our Cat's food last night and I just naturally did not like the thing. But then I realized that the Opossum was just doing what Opossums do. Not really his fault. And then this Silly poem started oozing out of my brain. Sometimes God does that to me. Sort of like that Opossum.

OPOSSUMS

I woke up the other morning and it was POURING outside. So naturally I started singing, "Rain rain go away..." And it didn't. But it did make me think I should write a poem about it. When I went to jot down the thought the whole thing just spilled out. Sometimes it happens that way.

RAIN RAIN

I don't remember where this poem came from, except... my wife's sister and her husband have the last name of Sweet. So I started thinking... (And, no, they don't smell bad.)

SMELLY

I just had my Birthday, so... well, there you go.

BIRTHDAY RINGS

We've had LOTS of cats over the years and while most of them use US as pillows, a couple of them were so big we could use THEM as pillows.

FAT CAT/FLAT CAT

I wrote Birds and Words because someone actually did put a beach ball in our pool, thinking that it would scare the ducks so they wouldn't land in the water. But since the ducks land in the water when I'm swimming, they're either not afraid... or, I thought, they can't read.

BIRDS and WORDS

As I was looking at Henry, he often let's me get quite close, the obvious phrase came to me, "Ducks ain't got no ears." Quite often the last line of a Silly Kids Poem will come to me, as this one did, and the rest of the poem fills around it.

DUCKS DON'T LISTEN

This one was easy. My cat has been sneezing a lot lately. And it was fun thinking of reasons why a cat would sneeze... 'cause lots of people, not animals, are allergic to Cats!

CAT SNEEZES

Every time we are on vacation and in the hot tub, invisible little bugs show up out of nowhere and chase us back into the house. I don’t know why they want to be in my ears and eyes… but it made me think of this poem.

WHERE DO BUZZY BUGS GO

I not really sure what made me think of this poem, but I REALLY like it. Sometimes it just works that way.

SUN/MOON

I really do love to eat eggs. And the juxtaposition between making an egg and MAKING an egg just seemed silly to me. Chickens get too little credit.

MAKING EGGS

I was sort of thinking of my kids when I wrote this, but I think most siblings think this at some point in their lives.

SISTER MAYBE

I don't really remember what I was thinking with this poem... I was just being Silly.

LUCKY HORSESHOE

My nephew, when he was young, always put a pet monkey on his Christmas list... every year. And that got me thinking about outrageous pets. Then it just got Silly.

MY NEW PET

I don't especially like it when parents use this technique when raising kids and I always wonder what it sounds like from a kid's perspective. Probably some creative thoughts.

1, 2, 3

I did some stuff like this with my kids when they were young. But I don't think it did any permanent damage.

SNEEZE

The last four lines came to me first and then I got to backfill the rest to match the ending.

BEST of the BEST

I do this sometimes even though I'm all grown up. I'll sneak, or should I say snack on, so many cookies during the day that when my wife offers me a cookie I usually stuff it down so she doesn't know I'm already stuffed.

COOKIE QUESTION

Wouldn't it be great to be able to fly?! But I don't think I could put up with the food choices.

I LOVE TO EAT BUGS

I was watching hummingbirds and bumblebees feed off the same flowers and thought, "Hmmm, bumble bees are very round and I've never seen a fat hummingbird." Sometimes that's all it takes for a Silly Kids Poem.

FAT HUMMINGBIRD

I was watching some ants and other bug doing different things and was thinking how different they are and the different things they do... besides bugging me.

I AM ME

I started thinking how, with the advent of computers, kids could no longer use the excuse, "My dog ate my homework." But then I thought about computer mice and cats. I'm sure you would have done the same thing.

MY CAT ATE MY HOMEWORK

I was just thinking about the life of a flower. I don't know why.

I NEVER STINK

I remember thinking stuff like this when I was a kid. Wouldn't it be neat to be a bug?

IF I WERE A BUG

Another long one, but I seem to remember doing something similar to our kids.

TIME TO GET UP

I got to thinking about what life would look like if you were very small. It's all about your point of view. Grown ups must look like giants.

POINT OF VIEW

Don't ask me where this one came from. I have no idea. It just came out of my pencil.

SMILE AND WINK

I had a picture of a bunch of sheep riding in a car. So I had to write this poem so I would have an excuse to paint the picture.

LOST SHEEP

I actually did this one Thanksgiving when I was too young to know any better. YUMMM!

THANKSGIVING FAVORITE

I think it takes a while before every kid figures out that they should be happy to be just themselves.

HAPPY TO BE

I have a feeling Sister knew this because she DOES this.

BOTHER BUGS

A friend asked me to write a poem about spiders. But I don't like spiders. At all. But I did it anyway.

I HAVE TO DRAW A... SPIDER

I don't think kids would understand this, but there's a BUNCH of stuff I wish I could forget.

I WISH I DIDN'T KNOW

I'm kind of glad our pets don't speak the same language.

PROBLEM PET

For some reason I was thinking about Boomerangs and Hamsters... I don't know why.

BEST FRIENDS

I wonder if all kids have had a dream like this. It was fun to think about as I wrote this one.

GERTRUDE the GIANT

This still happens to me every Christmas. After we've opened all of the gifts, with wrapping paper all over the floor, I think of all the stuff I should have asked for that I forgot to ask for this year.

NEXT YEAR

I was on vacation, watching clouds drift across the sky while I floated in the pool, when this poem came to me.

RABBIT, CAT, SKUNK

I was thinking about how frustrating it would be to want to write a poem and not being able to... I never have this problem... So I wrote a poem about not being able to write a poem.

GATORS and GOPHERS

I am a cat kind of guy and I feel sorry for people that tell me they can't have cats because they have allergies. I too have allergies but I like cats so much that it's still worth it.

PAT the CAT

I was having a conversation with a friend's young daughter who is sometimes DELIGHTFULLY silly and could hardly wait to get home so I could write this silly poem that spilled out of my head. Fun, fun, fun!

SILLY JUST BECAUSE

This one is, well, what can I say... it's about nothing. But I still like it.

NO PURPOSE AT ALL

This actually IS one of our cats. And he does bump our legs, arms, hands and anything else that comes close to his head. It's just his way.

OBVIOUSLY

This Silly Poem rolled around in my head for quite a while... unsure of how to organize itself. When I finally wrote it down I noticed that most of the pairs aligned themselves with other pairs that sort of made sense. Anyway, I know it's long but I hope you like it.

OPPOSITES ATTRACT

I love how kids, when they're very young, have no idea how much work pets take. My kids had multiple hamsters, parakeets, cats, a tortoise, and fish. And my son thought a panda would be nice. There might actually still be a hamster roaming around in our walls.

PAW PRINTS

This one's long, but there was a rhythm in my head and it didn't go away until I wrote this one down. There may be some of you that can identify with it... way back when.

CUTE LITTLE SIS

We saw lots of rabbits while we were on vacation and I wondered what they did all day... soooo

RABBITS, RABBITS

I know... this is a weird one. But when they come to me I have to write them down.

PILES of PEBBLES

I only do this on weekends, mostly. And only when my wife makes chocolate chips. I can't believe I didn't do this years ago.

BREAKFAST

One day I began to wonder just where the Easter Bunny gets all his eggs. I mean, wouldn't it make more sense to have an Easter Chicken?

EASTER CHICKEN

This Silly Kids Poem spilled out of my head as I was getting ready for work. I had to write it line by line as I was hopping around trying to put my socks on. When the poems fall out of my head, they fall out of my head... and sometimes work gets in the way.

PIG IN MY ROOM

I read a LOT. I mean A LOT. As I was falling asleep with my nose in a book, this quick little poem came to me. I like it.

PORTAL

My three New Zealand born nieces are an endless source of inspiration.

PESKY SISTERS

I was watching bugs the other day and thinking how their perspective would be fun... and then I thought how very big we are compared to them. And how dangerous it must be.

A BUG'S VIEW

I was thinking I should try to think up more unique pets that might cause me trouble... just for fun.

WALK A PET ll

This Silly Kids Poem surprised me as I was swimming. Since I don't have waterproof paper I had to repeat the first stanza over and over in my head until I found some paper.

WHO AM I

This Poem is somewhat self explanatory... from the first line. Of course the bug didn't really knock me down. But it was close! And it got me to thinking if bugs even see us giants coming their way. Or maybe they just don't pay attention.

BUG BATTLE

A friend of mine took some cute pictures of little baby bunnies and one of them always had a grumpy look on his face. And I knew I just had to write him into a poem. The problem was figuring out why a baby bunny would be grumpy.

GRUMPY LITTLE BUNNY

I think that Rabbits think that golf courses are a good place for rabbits to live. This is where I saw some lucky little Rabbits. And I remembered having a Rabbit's foot when I was just a kid, which is NOT so lucky for Rabbits. And then this poem came out.

LUCKY RABBIT'S FOOT

I remember when I wrote this one. I was watching rain falling on my fish pond and I thought what it must be like to be a drop of rain. Hmmm.

RAIN

I live someplace where it rains... A LOT! And after we had a lot of rain my fish pond overflowed and one of the fish swam out of the pond and started to swim down our garden path. I'm not sure where he thought he was going, but I made sure he got back to where he belonged. And then I wrote this.

CURIOUS FISH

This particular Silly Kids Poem was indeed inspired by a particular incident involving my son and daughter when they were young. And, yes, she still remembers it.

BUG COLLECTION

I was thinking back to when I was a kid and how it is to be an adult... and the different perspectives. Hmmm.

BERSERK

In case you haven't figured it out by now, bugs REALLY bug me when they buzz around my ears or my eyes or when they bite me!

WHAT DO BUGS EAT

The things that we parents think are important must sometimes sound ridiculous to our kids. Just as what our kids think important sounds silly to us.

MOM and DAD ARE ALIENS

I just thought one day that I should write a counting Silly Kids Poem for the younger kids... and this is what came out.

BARNYARD COUNTING

We have a cat that we thought would eat most anything... until part of a banana fell on the floor. And our cat wanted nothing to do with it. Then I realized, of course, that cats don't eat ANY vegetables... just like kids.

CATS DON'T EAT BANANAS

I do tend to Daydream and although I favor slip-on shoes for footware, I DO know how to tie my shoes.

DAYDREAMS

I am AMAZED that my cats get so excited EVERY morning when we feed them the same food day after day. They each have their favorites, of course, but still... EWWW!

ICKY CAT FOOD

I'm not really sure what I was thinking when I wrote this one... sometimes they just come out.

DAD ALWAYS SAID

We recently went to Disneyland and while I was sleeping in our hotel IN Disneyland I woke up and realized I was dreaming about Disneyland. It was perfect!

DREAM VACATION

Our cats MEOW at us all the time... and I have no idea what they are saying. Usually I figure it's just FEED ME.

MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW

I was dreaming about having a super power like flying or being able to breath under water... and thought back to when I was a kid and my brothers and I would go around the house shuffling our feet trying to shock each other.

ELECTRO-BOY

This one's sort of long, but it's one of my favorites. I was wondering what fish think when they see food on a hook? Maybe the hunger just sort of takes over.

WORM ON A HOOK

I'm pretty sure that pets think that they are the boss... at least cats do.

KING OF THE CASTLE

Lots of kids can't wait to be bigger. And stilts look like fun. I remember being pretty sore until I mastered them... when I was not so tall.

STILTS

Hmmm. Sort of makes you think.

NOAH'S MESS

I have heard tell of older brothers playing tricks on their younger siblings... I never did, but I've heard stories.

HALLOWEEN TREATS

I remember the endless days of Summer when I was a kid, thinking just like this... but I do NOT have a sister.

SUMMER-INGS

I just think weird things sometimes. Of course, this is not one of those times... but sometimes.

PERHAPS BUGS

I can only imagine if my cat was awake long enough to figure out how to use my computer.

BOX OF MOUSES

I wonder what kids think when we adults say some of the thing we say... like this.

FIND MY FROG

I like the idea of invisible friends and I liked the rhythm of this one

MY MAKE BELIEVE FRIEND

I like the thought of unusual pets... and how a kid might end up with them. I mean, you can't buy them at the pet store.

LITTLE LOST PENGUIN

I was feeling nostalgic about when I was a kid and how strange my stories must sound to my kids.

DAD TALES

Once you start thinking about things from a bugs point of view, it's sometimes hard to stop.

STRANGE GIFTS

We get a LOT of rain where I live and the 'Rain rain go away' song often runs through my head. And I thought I could come up with a fun illustration for this.

RAIN, RAIN GO AWAY

I woke up on a rainy Saturday morning and thought about what I remember thinking about days like this when I was a kid... and for my brothers, my friends, and me this was pretty much it. Not sure my mom was all that happy about it.

A PERFECT DAY

If you've read more than a few of my Silly Kids Poems you probably know that I'm not fond of Spiders. And again the other day, on my way out of my house, I got hit right in the face with a spider web. So here's another Spider poem.

CREEPY CRAWLY

If only this would work.

WEBS

I was sitting on my deck, hanging out with my cat, when I thought of this poem... from my cat's point of view.

PEOPLE TOES

I'm thinking I'll write some poems using phrases that little kids love to say. And the next one of course HAS to be, "After a while, Crocodile." Right!?

PICK A PET

This Silly poem came to me while I was swimming in Palm Springs... one stanza at a time. So I kept having to get out of the pool and dry my hands and arms and face so I wouldn't drip all over my notebook. Again and again and again. But I like that the meter and rhyming scheme is different. It takes what it takes, right?

ME, MYSELF, and I

I've always been amazed by how much an ant can lift and carry. And the ant/uncle thing... I just HAD to do it.

SUPER ANT

It's always amazing how little understanding kids have of the value of money... although the same can be said for some adults as well.

ALLOWANCE

Cats are often thoughtful creatures and they love to share. Or is it just me?

CAT, MOLE and MOUSE

I don't know why these dog poems keep coming to me as I don't even have a dog. Maybe I'm chasing my own tail.

CIRCLES

While swimming one vacation day I saw a bunch of rocks sitting on the bottom of the pool. And I thought, "I wonder if those rocks thought they could swim?" But that's just me.

A ROCK'S LIFE

I was trying to remember where this one came from... aaand, I have no idea. It just sort of oozed out of my brain. Sometimes that's how it happens.

PET SLUG

This sounds like something one of my kids, not saying which one, would have come up with.

CLOTHES ON THE FLOOR

I woke up this morning with this poem writing itself in my head. It's a warm Summer day that just happens to be in the first week of Autumn. I remember days that smell like this from when I was a kid... doing stuff with my dad.

DAD and ME

I was swimming this morning and found a floating duck feather. I looked at the swimming duck (I don't think he knows he's not supposed to be in the pool) and imagined he was an elephant... and then, well my brain goes sideways sometimes.

FEATHER IN MY POCKET

I remember thoughts like this running around in my head when I was just a kid. And maybe someday I'll even figure out what I should be.

I THINK I'LL BE

I've been swimming every morning while on vacation. And there's always a duck in the pool. So I named him Henry and yes, he poops in the pool despite me telling him not to.

HENRY THE DUCK

I walked into the kitchen this morning and was, uhhh, surprised by a very large spider waiting to attack me... maybe. I'm pretty sure there was a little scream, but it may have been the spider.

WEBS

I was getting ready to eat breakfast, not looking for a poem, when the first two lines spilled out of my brain. I tried to continue eating, but when the Silly Poems want to be written, you have to write them down.

WHICH ONE AM I

I was on vacation, enjoying a relaxing morning, when a poem started to form in my head about my peaceful surroundings. I quickly figured out it was good but not funny in any way... so I added my brother.

COOL BREEZE

This is my second poem using silly kids rhymes as the final line. It's a fun bit of work to work backwards from the last line.

IN THE JUNGLE

One of the Rabbits I saw on a golf course was sitting in the exact pose that reminded me of Chocolate Easter Bunnies. If you've ever eaten one you know exactly what I mean.

YUMMY BROWN BUNNY

I was reading a novel by a famous author and found a missing comma that totally changed the meaning of the sentence.(It happens to the best of us.) So I wrote this and thought it quite funny.

PUNCTUATION

I'm not sure why this thought occurred to me, but I thought I should write a Silly Kids Poem where all the rhymes sound like they end with the same letter. And then I thought, "And they should be in alphabetical order." Hmmm.

ALPHABET GAME

While floating on my back in a pool I saw some geese flying haphazardly overhead. And this is what came out.

CONFUSTIGATED GEESE

I'm not particularly partial to ice cream myself, but I do know it tends to mysteriously disappear. And everyone says, "Not ME!"

ICE CREAM TROLLS

I love Dragonflies. I started to think about all the other insects that have 'FLY' in their names and... voilà!

DRAGONFLIES

I heard someone say one of these silly phrases, so I wrote down a bunch of others and tried to make a Silly Kids Poem that makes SOME sort of sense out of them. Sometimes it goes like that.

PHRASES

As I was writing this I kept picturing a carousel in a field of flowers, but it never really made it into the poem. Though I still imagine one when I hear the poem.

THE BUMBLYBEE BALL

For some reason, one day, I thought of words that sound the same. Like Bear and Bare. And that Bears would never wear shoes at the beach, so they would have bare Bear feet. Then I thought that might scare some people. In a Silly way I thought that people might be scared not because of a bear at the beach, but because of the bare Bear feet. Hmmm.

BEAR FEET

It's always fun when I start to see things from the perspective of my young nieces and nephews. It's a strange world.

DADDY LONG LEGS

I'm amazed by how many different sounds a stomach can make. Mine, for the first time in my life, when it rumbled, sounded like a frog. Really! So I wrote this.

FROG IN MY POCKET

Bugs bug me so much that I started to wonder if anything bugs a bug.

WHAT REALLY BUGS BUGS

I never see little bugs until they are buzzing in my eyes, nose, or ears. It made me wonder how they all figure out when it's time to come bug me. All of them... all at once.

TELEPATHIC BUGS

One of our cats tends to throw up a LOT. And I was simply trying to figure out a positive side to this feline unpleasantness.

CAT BARF

I was thinking about how early my cat wakes me up for breakfast. And then I thought about how nice it would be if she could tell time. And then I thought about watch dogs... and flipped it

WATCH CAT

I have no sisters so I never did this... but my son did something similar to HIS sister.

SAD SIS

My wife makes the BEST cookies. That is all.

COOKIES

I'm sure if you've got a cat you know EXACTLY what this poem is about.

MEOW

I was imagining putting faces on vegetables and then thought about what they thought about being eaten...

GROWING UP

Anyone that owns a cat lives with this EVERY day!

WHO'S THE BOSS

Every cat owner knows this is true.

MY CAT HAS A PET

C'mon, admit it. You all hear the call... sometimes

COOKIE CALL

A friend of mine took a picture of her short legged dog, and the legs on his shadow were so long it looked like an elk... so.

SHADOW FRIEND

We pet owners swear some of our pets can actually sort of talk to us... but not worms.

MY PET WORM

I tried to have an open mind about Black Widows, give them the benefit of a doubt... but I still don't like them.

A NAME IS JUST A NAME

I'm not really sure where this one came from... except I was remembering that siblings sometimes see each other differently than their parents do.

MY BROTHER IS AN ALIEN

I was making breakfast and saw a pretty big thing walking across our kitchen counter. When I looked I was surprised that I was seeing a large shadow of a very small bug. So I had to write this.

SUNSHINE and SHADOWS

Virtually every morning my cat watches me get dressed and it made me wonder how silly we must seem to them.

CLOTHES

I was sort of remembering what it was like to go on vacation when I was a kid and my folks told me to pack my suitcase. although I'm sure my Mom checked my suitcase after I was asleep.

I'M TAKING A VACATION

I was outside being swarmed by bugs and I found myself thinking about how huge I am compared to the bugs and, no surprise, this poured out of my brain.

CHEETAHS, SNAILS, AND PENGUINS

Being sick as an adult is bothersome, but I remember being a kid and finding the positive side of being just sick enough that I could not go to school.

COUGH COUGH SNEEZE

I have always thought it would be fun to be a bird, but if you really think about it... there are several things that I don't think I'd like.

IF ONLY

I like dogs, but I am NOT fond of my neighbors BARKING dogs, so...

BUSTER the DOG

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